Love Can Conquer | Child Abuse Prevention Month
At Thornwell I have served as a Teaching Parent in our A.R.C. Residential program and currently as Coordinator of Ministry and Recreation. In both roles, it has been my privilege to get to know and share life with the youth we have on campus. I love what I do. But, when I think about the youth we serve and the stories they have shared of their abusive pasts, it is like being surprised by a kick to the stomach. You can’t speak because you can hardly breathe.
In Ecclesiastes 1:8, Solomon wrote, “For with much wisdom is much sorrow; as knowledge increases, grief increases.”
If you work here, you know this truth far too well. Before any youth will really tell their story, a relationship has to be established. They have to know you care and have their best interests at heart. For staff, by the time a youth gets to this point, our hearts are locked. You love these kids for who they are, you see the potential God has planted inside of them. when they finally open up about their past abuse, you are gutted.
“… as knowledge increases, grief increases.”
At Thornwell, I have learned that child abuse leaves scars on the brain, and unless properly treated, those scars never fully heal. The external physical wounds of abuse may fade, but the trauma – the pain, fear, and breaking of trust – can neurologically alter a developing brain for life. The traumatic damage caused by childhood abuse or neglect can cause emotional, behavioral, psychological, and relational struggles far into adulthood.
I find a tremendous amount of joy knowing that the youth we serve are receiving the love, support, and treatment they need to heal. I’m honored that God is allowing me to be a part of a better story they will tell in the future.
The sorrow comes when you see statistics. In 2021, there were 15,308 confirmed child victims of maltreatment in South Carolina. The grief comes when you realize that the number of actual abuse victims is estimated to be much higher: 1 in 7 children experienced abuse or neglect in 2019, and according to the CDC this is likely an underestimate.
Most abuse is hidden, ignored, or accepted as normal.
Although this brings me sorrow, I refuse to be paralyzed by it. I’ve seen the transformation that love brings. As Jesus said, “Love covers a multitude of sins.” I want to put love into action — and I hope you do too.
Here are some simple things you can begin doing today that will make a difference in the lives of children in your community:
- Pray for the children in your community. God hears you.
- Be a good neighbor. Take genuine interest in the people who live next to you or across the street. Love is contagious.
- Be kind to strangers. Hurting people hurt people.
- Support your teachers and local schools. They serve on the frontlines of this battle.
- If you strongly suspect a child is being abused, don’t ignore that weight in your stomach. Report it. In South Carolina, SCDSS has a 24/7 hotline: 1-888-CARE4US or 1-888-227-348
- God hears you.
Love can conquer the grief!
https://cwoutcomes.acf.hhs.gov/cwodatasite/pdf/south%20carolina.html#footnote5
https://www.cdc.gov/violenceprevention/childabuseandneglect/fastfact.html
Adam Hafenbridle
Thornwell Ministry and Recreation Coordinator